Still Alice - of Alzheimers and Dementia

This blog post is dedicated to my aunt who is living with Alzheimers.A dedication to the laughter, the Christmas gifts - she used to go around making sure each family member got a Christmas gift and Oh what a dotting grandmother she is.The happier times we had growing up - you will always be Aunty Wanjiru.

There are only two diseases that make me sad. Well make that three - Alzheimers dementia, Multiple sclerosis , Huntingtons disease oh make that four and ALS. Actually let me take that back. Any disease that is neuro-debilitating makes me sad to my soul. These are disease that eat away at the neurons of our body. They are mostly auto- immune - the body for some weird reason is fighting off its own neurological system.The geek in me is fascinated by the science behind it all - a body destroying its own body? *sips tea*. But the human in me has a heart that breaks every time I hear stories of patients of their lives before Alzheimers. Here is a link you need to see its short I promise Still Alice.

 I read the book Still Alice and it moved me to tears - absolute tears. I have not even watched the movie..Today at work I walk in to a patients room. Her husband was holding her hand and he was watching TV.She was staring into oblivion - a blank stare on her face. He turned off the TV when I walked in and begun talking and talking and talking some more... He told me all about her. About them. He told me they met in college. Graduate school. She was studying for her Masters in English. She was a Literature professor.They lived in Brockton.They have a son and two daughters. I sit down and listen.He continues how they traveled the world together. I gulp down saliva as I look at the lady he is talking about. Can barely recognize where or who she is. He continues with a distant look in his eyes. We had good times together. He pulls her arm closer as he says, " But now I doubt she even recognizes me." I sigh. He continues to say he does not know anyone in her family who had Alzheimers. 

The reason neuro debilitative - jeez what a mouthful...neurodebilitative diseases sadden me is that you re like a mind stuck within a body that you do not recognize. You can hear, you can smell you can taste but you just cannot be able to connect the dots of all these senses. Where you look at a cat and say the word dog. Where you use a toothbrush to brush your hair. You pick up sphagetti with a knife. You look at your husband and call him brother Jim.You just cannot connect the dots. I have worked with patients with Alzheimers for a while and you see their frustration, you hear that voice crying out for help trapped in this body they have no control over.

So take time to be patient with your loved ones, love on them, hold their hand until they cannot hold yours any longer. Take in the emotions - even if they call you Mama Joe and yet you are sister Mary. For somewhere tucked behind all the confusion , forgetfulness and blank stares are memories and laughter and joy that no disease can take away...

" People will forget what you said and what you did. But they will never forget how you made them feel.